stealhearted | are you hurting the one you love?

[He can't put words to the way seeing Akira get flustered makes him feel. He likes it-- he likes it a lot, to see him honest and shy like that, so much that it makes his stomach squirm. He licks his lower lip, pulls it between his teeth in thought, and shrugs gently.] ...I don't know what to ask, but it's true that I don't know very much about you, and should change that.

[ Akira can't help the way his eyes are laser focused on the way Goro worries at his lip. He really can't. He catches himself staring after a moment and averts his eyes, successfully flustered and flushed. ]

Well... It's honestly because I was so bad at being myself. So I'm still figuring out a lot of things. But, umm... let's see. I learned to make omurice when I was a kid and I got really good at them. [ He can do the really cool ones that melt open like an egg monster. ]

[He doesn't even register it, which is honestly probably a saving grace for Akira. He's already weaponized the fact that Akira thinks he's hot in a bath house, he doesn't need to start doing it in zoos.]

[He takes a few steps, pulling Akira gently to walk with him. His tone is careful when he asks:] Was that from necessity or interest?

Sort of both. My parents left me money, but neither of them liked cooking and konbini food gets old after awhile. [ Akira walks with him and speaks a little quietly, because he's aware that his upbringing leaves something to be desired. But Goro's was worse, he thinks, and so he keeps his tone carefully level. ]

But I saw a video online and wanted to see if I could do it.

[He hums, nodding and filing that information away for later. He would argue there was no better or worse in the scheme of rough childhoods, but he would likely also argue that Akira's rung worse to him because he had both parents, but they were borderline negligent. At least his excuse was being an unplanned bastard son orphaned before he reached double digits.]

[He wonders if he should follow suit and share a story of being young, but struggles to think of one that doesn't read like he's trying to best him for terrible things children shouldn't have to do, so he refrains.] Omurice aren't especially easy-- I can make scrambled eggs, but I think most anyone can throw something into a pan and smack it around until it's some degree of edible. Omelettes take more precision... it's impressive, but unsurprising given your knack for something as complex as curry.

I like cooking. [ He offers a smile to Goro, because the last thing he wants is Goro to think he doesn't want to cook for him. He genuinely enjoys it. ]

I liked to give myself challenges. It -- I mean, my parents never cared, but before I was arrested I had a few cool teachers that always acted like they were impressed.

[His expression sours at the blasé way Akira says his parents never cared, but only briefly, and he rearranges their twined fingers so he can loop his arm through Akira's as well.]

Well I can't cook much and not well, so I can say with relative confidence I will likely always be impressed.

I like being able to impress you. [ Akira says it with a mild grin that has a little more bite than usual, because Goro has always been a challenge that Akira can't so easily overcome. In that regard, Akira feels like dating was the natural progression of things. If you can't (always) beat them, then join them, right? ]

It's hard to say how many things I do because I really like them, but I know I enjoy doing most things with you.

[He frowns slightly, leaning into his shoulder.] Can I ask you something that might upset you?

...Yeah. [ Akira squeezes his hand a little, as a reassurance. There's not... a whole lot that's off limits for Akechi to ask, even if there are things that are going to get a lot more drawn out silences than others. ]

Would you enjoy it as much if I didn't make it such a challenge? [He's mostly past disbelief that Akira really likes him. It's harder to doubt, these days. But he still has to try and find the loopholes.]

[ Akira pauses for a moment, then tugs Goro over. There's a little set of gardens, and there's some shade there, so he tugs him in under a patch of trees that's the perfect backdrop if Goro were still doing the social media influencer thing. He turns to face him, once he does, reaching forward to roll the ends of Goro's hair between his fingers. ]

But you're always going to be a challenge. You're smart, and you're capable, and whatever you do, you're determined to do well. You cheated at being a detective, sure, but you can't cheat at bouldering -- and you're good at puzzles besides that. I want to impress you. I want to make sure I always have your attention. Even if I beat you at everything -- which I doubt would ever happen -- I'd still want to do even better, because you're here.

[His eyes burn a little at Akira's straightforward disassembly of his argument, so he closes them, focusing on the dull sensation in his scalp from Akira rolling the ends of his hair between his fingers. It feels nice, in a strangely detached way.]

[He brings his hands to cup Akira's elbows, after a moment of being still, nodding.] I'm glad. They say it's important for people who are close to challenge each other to do their best, I-- [His breath catches, and he shakes his head, because he's not really upset enough to be reacting this way, he's just struggling. Emotions are hard.] ... I want that. I want to challenge you, and I want you to challenge me, and I want to not be this horrible vicious jealous creature I allowed myself to grow into.

I think you're already getting there. [ Akira offers him a smile, genuine and careful. ] Even if your first reaction isn't good, you're getting better at waiting a few seconds to try again.

[ He leans in to kiss Goro -- not on the forehead, but a gentle, easy one on the lips, hidden away by the gentle vine swells of the garden as they are. ]

No matter what, I love you, so no matter what you change into, I'll still love you. [ After all, he liked Goro at his worst. ]

[He manages a weak chuckle, following Akira's mouth and kissing him several times in short, rapid fire motions.] Somehow I don't find that the butterfly analogy suits me very well.

[ Akira can't help but laugh a little at the immediate mental image of Goro as a beautiful butterfly. Yeah, maybe not that. ]

Caterpillars eat more than you do anyway.

[He stays close, smiling like he's hiding the expression against Akira's skin.] Was there anything else you wanted to see here, [He thinks the question is a bit more suggestive than necessary, but he would like to absorb some of Akira's face before they see Ann and Ryuji and he can't quite do that effectively at a zoo.]

...It was mostly the guinea pigs. [ Akira admits, a little embarrassed, but he knows that no one except maybe Ryuji would judge him in the slightest for liking cute furry animals, and Ryuji would be objectively wrong. ]

Was there somewhere else you wanted to go?

[He hums, shaking his head.] ...back to the cafe, maybe. I'd-- [He stops, reproached, and draws back enough to frown at Akira's collarbone.] ...I'd like to kiss you, but I'm not exactly comfortable doing so excessively in public.

[ It's excessively silly, Akira thinks, to blush at that, when they've made out several times and also fucked against the wall in Mementos -- but it's also nice, to hear Goro say it. It makes Akira feel warm like sitting right next to the space heater, except from the inside out. ]

Yeah. I'd like that. [ Not that there was any doubt that Akira is ready to kiss Goro at a moment's notice, but Akira thinks there is frequently doubt in Goro's mind. So. ]

Now I'll be looking forward to it the whole way back.

[There is frequently doubt in Goro's mind about a lot of things. More things than there aren't doubt about, really. Carefully, he shifts to take hold of just one of Akira's fingers, fidgeting with it and keeping his eyes fixed on it.]

...don't think too loudly or I'll chicken out of it.

[ Akira just grins, and then steps out to tug Goro with him to head back out of the zoo. He definitely thinks it was yen well spent to stop by, in part because he will now forever have an extremely cute picture of Goro covered in little creatures. ]

I won't let you chicken out of it.

[Akechi would agree-- he enjoyed their time. He has such a short social rope that he doesn't want to overextend when they're meant to spend time with Ann and Ryuji, though. Ann doesn't exhaust him the way many of the others do, but he knows at least some amount of their day will be spent with Ryuji as well, if only at the start and end of the time.]

[He squeezes Akira's hand.] Is that a threat or a promise?

A challenge. [ Akira offers, throwing back to the previous conversation. He doesn't think Goro would chicken out, not really, and even if Goro did start to get cold feet Akira would never want to push him.

But still. The challenge has been issued; he knows they'll both rise to the occasion. ]

[He can't help the small quirk of his lips, and he picks up his head to let it linger, looking at him.] I see what you've done, with that. Well played.

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